When you gave me the exotic fruit that brought my misfortune, I accepted it with joy, as much for its beauty as because it came from you. I took pleasure in gazing at it, but convinced that it was more suited to be looked at than eaten, and not wanting to destroy it, I thought about what I could do with it. It was then that Paulin was ill. Thus, the idea of visiting him came to mind. Believing that I could not make a better use of the gift you gave me than by giving it to a man who you loved and needed it, I gave it to him in turn. Yet Paulin did not conceal my generosity because, as I had not told him I received it from you, the same sentiment that drove me to offer him this apple probably led him, to express his appreciation for the gift I gave him, to entrust it to someone more deserving than he. If you tell me I should never part with your gifts, for everything that comes from the beloved should be as precious as life itself, I will agree with you, as it is one of my arguments to justify myself. But here, there is a distinction, for the love of men can lead to a multitude of reactions and each situation that this passion brings forth is unique. The affection between a husband and wife is not the same as that between a lover and a mistress, even if they are the same people and their love still burns as strongly as before their marriage. Their feelings are different in many ways- they are stronger, less artificial, and all the follies that an unmarried liaison provides do not lie in their heart. Thus, if Paulin had harboured passion for me, he would have carefully preserved this apple that I offered him, with caution and jealousy, for it is true that through such an affection, even the smallest things from the beloved are of immeasurable value and one could die for them. But as soon as he received this gift from me, he gave it to you and it could be said he was more intent on pleasing you than satisfying me. As for me, I could never have imagined you would criticise me for giving away something you gifted me, or that generosity is a trait I could not possess. If I may give only what you have not given me, then I should give myself, having brought to your palace nothing but the simplicity and innocence that they seek to rob from me today. 

What, do you not remember the considerable wealth you have granted me? I have given it away and enriched whole cities many times over. Would Theodosius have allowed me to distribute gold, pearls and diamonds to hundreds of people unknown to him while he would not approve my offering a mere fruit to a man who needed it and for whom Theodosius held affection? No, that did not make sense, and even Pulcheria, as perceptive as she is and thinks herself to be, would have agreed with me. If I were to take care of anyone after you, it should be Paulin, and I could even say that I owe him more than to my father and even to you. My father gave me life and you offered me the throne, but I can say that Paulin, by teaching me the lights of faith, deserves my gratitude more than anyone else on this earth. Indeed, I owe my access to heaven to him if